“Lasting Regret”

You can ask her. “She who shalnt be named.”

There was a party at her house and her sister was there with both children. A new guy and all seemed well. We sent them along innocent and things were right...

She and I were bent over the line and somewhere around 2 or 3 am the phone was burning a hole in the side table.

I woke her up and the worst kind of news split the airwaves: “I didn’t want to have to tell you this...your sister has been raped.”

“We have him in custody.” “I’ll bring her to y’all.”

That memeory weighs on me...why didn’t I wake up after the first ring...turns out it was close to 10 rings...that devastated woman...BOTH of them...

I was just a puppy love drunk who was so far gone he couldn’t hear that cry for help...

What it is to have help, could’ve helped and DIDNT...?!??

Guilt is healthier weight than body fat, lean muscle or fortitude...that’s a memory I will NEVER forget or forgive myself for.

People should be better.

I know I wasn’t. Should’ve just stopped to stop the cancer of the earth..,instead I just was selfish to the point that I kept going in order to numb my insecurities...so in turn I let my mind die so abysmally that a crime was allowed to happen.

I will carry that with me. As deserved.

Be better. Be more intune. Leave self behind.

I’m SO sorry for all involved except that piece of DNA trash that took advantage...I’ll gladly meet you at the gates of Hell...eye to eye...I’m your demon...making your existence...less than that.